Donald Trump, A Good Christian

DONALD TRUMP IS A GOOD CHRISTIAN. We know this because he said so several months ago before a live audience of thousands, while his good Christian disciples shouted "lock her up!", to a television audience of millions, most of whom were probably screaming the same words at their flat screens. He is also, so he says, able to sexually molest any woman of his choosing without impunity, because he is famous. This is quite in keeping with Christian doctrine, according to which women are the property of men. A famous and good Christian sexual predator. All this is related. Christians, by definition, do not pay for their own sins. Instead, they unabashedly rejoice in their vicarious atonement by virtue of a man being slowly tortured to death. Donald Trump is a prime example of an exemplary American conservative Christian. Trump and his followers want to imprison a person without any proof of wrong doing, as was done to Jesus. Jesus, at least, was given a trial, and although his trail was a sham, a miscarriage, of justice, it is more than the law and order conservatives want to give Hillary Clinton. One can imagine Trump supporters chanting "lock up Christ!", and "crucify our savior!", as they relish the thought of their own escape from justice. Trump and his saved supporters advocate carrying weapons, perhaps to ensure the imprisonment of Hillary Clinton and the execution of Jesus, both of which they regard as necessary to their personal salvation. They resist paying taxes, just like the followers of Jesus, who himself told them to "render unto Caesar". He collects as much personal wealth as possible, and we await the day when he goes thy way, sells whatsoever he hast, and gives unto the poor. We await his charitable foundation's very first contribution to charity, holding our collective breaths as the hungry get hungrier. Although he renders nothing unto Caesar, and praises himself for his ability to avoid doing so, he surely will at some future time, in keeping with the teachings of his lord and savior. Trump and the Taxed Enough Already party, finally paying up, just like their savior said. That will have to wait a bit, until he is able to free himself from a relentless succession of bankruptcies. Trump's admiration of the ruthless and brutal dictator Vladimir Putin is a metaphor for the worship of a blood thirsty god who repeatedly demands blood sacrifices and upon occasion instructs people to dash out the brains of infants upon rocks. Hillary Clinton's praise of Trump's children is justified on the basis that all of them, at least those of whom we are aware, are still living, proving that they have never misbehaved. If they had, Trump would have put them to death, in accordance with Biblical law. Trump falls short of the glory of God in one important respect; he often works on the Sabbath, and for that, he should be put to death, in accordance with the law of God, as written in the holy scripture. Trump won't mind; he is, after all, a good Christian.