Wednesday, May 15, 2024

Showing Off

SHOWING OFF, that topic, has made much ado in my life the last coupla days. My Facebook lady friend in Florida, a retired nurse with a long list of personal accomplishments and affluent lifestyle, posts a photo of her lovely swimming pool, if not once daily, then twice hourly, to exaggerate a tad. Yes, its lovely. So lovely and so often visually shared that I started making a few wisecracks about it. "I hear you've got a pool! Is that true." That sort of thing. I love the way she decorates her pool deck, with beautiful potted plants which she also has the good grace to share. A notion struck me, that she seems a mite proud of her cement pond, and likes to share it with others - to the point of "showing it off". She got a mite wrathy over my smart ass remarks; even gracious, affluent upper middle class ladies have limits to their tolerance, and those limits are sometimes easy to reach, bordering on the thin skinned. Finally, she snapped. "What's wrong with you lately?", she shot. "you tell me, you're the expert",I shot back. Then: "nothing's wrong with me that proper medication and a few years of psychotherapy can't handle. Lighten up. That's what you told me once". "I am light!" said she. "You're light, and I'm a few pounds overweight", I retorted. (Actually, I'm fit. Self deprecating humor works wonders). Then, as a last resort, I turned intellectual. I lectured her as follows: Human beings by nature are creatures who seek self esteem, approval, and apprecation. Basic needs. Mazlow, and all that. To that end, what we have, what we can do, what we do and have ever done, we share, with somebody. Sometimes we share it with the world, on Faceboook. Those who lack possessions or achievement either invent them, or languish in a self esteem desert wishing they had something about which to toot their proverbial horns. I am the world's worst, I continued. I love to mention my education, I like to strut my intelligence, such as it is,I play a mean game of tennis, I am a long distance runner, although a mediocre one. And, most of all, I love, simply love to brag about my five hundred blood donations over the past fifty years. I mean, I'm bad. But, it works. Hell, I feel better'n hell about myself, whether or not its merited. Merit isn't the point. The point is; food, clothing shelter, self esteem. Again, Mazlow. Now, the lady never did come right out and agree with me, and acknowledge that yes, she agrees with me, she understands my point, and that yes, she is proud of her lovely swimming pool, and likes to "share it" with others, aka, show it off. No, she didn't do that. But one thing she didn't do is express any disagreement with me. In fact, she smiled, and nodded, and that's good enough for me. I will never bring myself to exclaim: "my, what a lovely swimming pool". A swimming pool is not a personal achievement, but rather, a mere thing. But I will and do gush all over her beautiful plants, because they are indeed beautiful, she works hard to nourish and maintain them, whereas somebody else, her "pool guy" as she puts it, cleans her swimming pool. The plants are a true achievement, and the beauty they give her she gives to the world. God bless her. This essay is great.

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