Anything's Possible: going retro

SITTING ON THE COUCH, remote control in hand, changing channels every three seconds, checking out all seventy eight, over and over again. This ritual might be somebody's idea of a good time, but not mine.

You're afraid to stop clicking, because when you do you see a gorgeous housewife screaming at a man in the front yard, or a house full of trash, cats, and a therapist, or a random mass murder, or a baseball player readjusting his necklace and earrings. Or, usually, a commercial.

Male human bieings have no choice but to do this, click click click, given their nature, and their environment. Explore all opportunites. Keep options open. A basic, and very clever survival technique. Rather similar to looking for a woman.

IN a strange sort of way, I enjoyed television much more in the nineteen sixties, when there were onlky three channels, and one had to get off one's derrier and walk across the living room to change channels.

Of course, when you're ten years old, getting up, walking a few steps, and sitting back down doesn't seem like the ordeal it does later in life. REmote control must have been invented by  a senior citizen.

One option is to get rid of cable and satellite, and get a sdigital converter and a set of rabbit ear antennae, probably all for under a hundred dollars. NO more monthly charges, and far fewer channels, maybe down to about half a dozen or so, depending on where you live.

Another option is to throw away the remote control, and force yourself once again, to walk to the television set to change channels, giving you jore exercise, and making the process one of higher investment, and therefore more meaningful.

Another option is to give up the high definition big flat screen, and find a thierteen inch black and white, though that might be hard. They don't even make black and whites anymore, and that's a shame. Its a shame to see that particular option disappear entirely.

Retro TV lifestyle! It just might be the way to go! The final step would  logically be to view only shows like "Bonanza" and "Gunsmoke" and "andy Griffith", and to be ten years old again. As they say, anything's possible.