Grieving

I AWAKENED AT THREE, and went outside to enjoy a rather tame thunderstorm. I arose for good at seven, fed the cats, and noticed that one of them was missing. I went back outside, and saw my blue point glance at me from the corner of the yard, than vanish when I took a step towards him. He has not yet returned, although its been ten days. Just this morning I heard a familiar voice in the driveway, and caught a glimpse of who I believe to be him, but he again ran, obviously traumatized. So, I have hope. When I realized he was missing, I became stricken with grief, and the grief has only slowly abated over the last ten days. My grief was greater than when either of my parents died, or when the World Trade Center fell. I reckon its al relative. I find it fascinating that the greatest emotional pain of my life was precipitated by an indoor cat getting outdoors. But I'm smart enough not to judge it, not to condemn myself, but to accept it for what it is; interesting priorities. I always knew that my parents would die, and was prepared for it, to the extent that on can ever truly prepare for the death of one's parents. I have been told by people with both pets and children that the pets are in fact children. Without children, pets assume an even greater place within the heart. I can scarcely imagine the sustained grief of people whose loved one's have vanished, and have been missing for years. There are apparently thousands of such people, and all one can do is pray for them. A wise friend of mine once wrote that a a person who has been pricked by a pin has the right to feel pain, even as his neighbor endures a knife wound. it is my belief that one should never be ashamed to feel grief, joy, or anything else. People who have inflicted death or pain upon an enemy in military combat endure great suffering, which is now coming to be called "moral penalty", or something like that. To those who have been killed in combat we rejoice at their entry into heaven. And to those who have had the misfortune to kill another person in battle we grieve that he must live in a self imposed hell, until help arrives, and is he is made whole again. To those who have suffered the disappearance of a love one, human or otherwise, may your grief be comforted.