Rewarding Seattle, and Denver, For Wisdom

IT WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN. Its yet another of those magical circumstances which inspire the phrase "only in America". How many times have we heard that? Its always true, only in America. This time its a coincidence nearly beyond belief. Sheer, utter, serendipity. True justice, in its highest, most totally cosmic form, dude. The two teams in Sunday's Super Bowl are from the two states, the only two states thus far, which have legalized marijuana. There are thirty two teams in American Professional football, the NFL, (violent American football, not real football), and there are fifty American states. Go figure. What are the odds? Obviously, what we are dealing with is either divine intervention, or alien intervention, which, from our point of view, amount to the same thing. Any sufficiently advanced technology seems like magic. Colorado and Washington state are the two states in these United States which had the guts to face reality, and legalize marijuana. And for that, they are both rewarded with a Super Bowl berth. Will they be lighting joints at their tables in the sports bar, while the buxom babes bring more hot wings? Or, will they simply step outside, or even out behind? Will there be folks strolling down Pearl Street in Boulder bogarting doobies? Only time will tell. Some things one must learn for one's self. Hope to see ya in Denver, Boulder, or Seattle, or Olympia, or... and waht about thelayers themselves? A post game reefer to celebrate the ring? Well, maybe, it just depends. Hallelujah! Well done, Denver and Seattle. Well done. What wouldn't you give to be in either place Sunday, February 2, or both places, simultaneously. You just have to know that folks in those two bastions of progressive thought are going to have an absolute, total blast. Sunday, and beyond. Divine providence, call it. The wise being rewarded for their wisdom. You almost wish that both teams could win.

Sending Kids to Congress

JUST THE OTHER DAY it happened yet again. Some fresh faced member of the United States House of Representatives lashed out, verbally, at a member of the mainstream American news media. Lit into him pretty good, like a wrathy panther. Ho Hum. Happens every day, or so it seems. If memory serves, this Congressperson was another one of those young republican guns, a latter day jesus guns and money type, all tea party, all hype, full of vim, vigor, and vinegar. And, if memory serves, this kid wasn't a day over thirty, from a bright red state. Hell, he'll be in Congress if and when the grand old plutocracy (America) celebrates its tricentennial. Another Strom Thurmond, tottering up Capitol Hill, a near centenarian, rasping laissez faire nigh unto the twenty first century. Oh, joy. The problem is, they just get started way too young, and they stay way too long. In the early years of their careers, they are brash, unthinking ideologues, all full of themselves, volcanically spewing fire and brimstone. Walking sound bytes. Then, they mellow into middle aged, tacitly reasonable legislators. But that stage doesn't last long, because before you know it they are settling into sedantary seniority, while assistants pocket corporate money like clock work, ho hum, and do all the mail outs, phone calls, and ritualistic reelection ad campaigns. By then, the electorate, benumbed, is nothing resembling an effective watchdog. Why should anybody bother? The die are cast, we all know where we stand, and further discussion seems pointless. According to the U.S. Constitution, that inconc if outdated document which came from Mt. Sanai, in ancient times, any American citizen over the age of twenty five without a felony conviction can seek election to and serve in the U.S. House of Representatives. Well, and well, at least you have to be thirty years old or older to be a U.S. Senator, and thirty five to be President. Otherwise we might be electing Justin Beiber and Lady Gaga to govern us.

Riding Waxman Out of Town, On a Rail

WHEN A WORTHY OPPONENT lays down his weapons, and walks away quietly and proudly, the proper response involves the extension of the right hand, and a hale and hearty farewell, well done, you were a worthy opponent. But that aint likely to happen with Congressperson Henry Waxman of California, who rode in on the anti-Nixon tidal wave in 1974. Most of those people, the liberal class of '74, like our World War Two veterans, are gone now. Waxman ranks right along with Hubert Humphrey, Ted Kennedy, and Lyndon Johnson in the lexicon of loquacious liberal lawmakers. One of the reasons he's retiring, at the tender age of seventy four, is that he is unwilling to continue the fight in an organization whose current members regard all opposition as a bitter enemy, rather than a potential partner in compromise. Graciousness, reason, and magnanimity be damned. Its never been worse in Congress, Waxman says. There'll be no gold watches and handshakes from the conservative side of the isle. Only jeering insults. And that's a shame. When Waxman was elected, Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio were in diapers. They often behave as if they still were. In all honesty, the United States Congress has never been a place of kumbaya conciation, but up until about thirty years ago, it was at least civilized. How we miss the halcyon days of Tip O'Neil and Ronald Reagan, having a green beer together at the pub. Ironic that Reagan is the patron saint of the current crop of conservative republicans. Hell, these guys are no more like Reagan, they no more belong in Reagan's category, than a heifer in a horse pond. The Gipper, albeit lacking overt compassion, was a man who was willing to listen to his opponent's point of view, and to factor it into his own thinking. Reagan was a man of honor, and a man of peace, fundamentally. We can hope that the tea party doesn't entirely forget the civility of their chosen icon, as they ride Henry Waxman out of town, on a rail.

Dealing With Snowden

WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT, it was bound to happen. Still, its hilarious. American traitor, or hero, depending on your take, Edward Snowden is being nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. The nominators are a couple of Norwegian socialists, so, surprise sprprise. It does go to show, however, that there are people beyond our American borders who do not necessarily consider the American global empire-surveillance police state to be the greatest thing sinced sliced bread. Surprise surprise. And, whatd'ya think the odds are that the little bastard will not only be nominated, but will win teh damned thing, to boot? I wouldn't bet against him, and I wouldn't put it past 'em. For verily, far more controversial folk have won teh coveted prize, such trouble makers as Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King, and Albert Einstein, all of whom were a definite thrat to the American military industrial complex. According to physicist Richard Feynman, Alfred Nobel invented too bad things: dynamite, and the Nobel prizes. The Norwegian politicians who nominated Snowden explained that they think the young ex patriot has rendered an enormous service to humanity, by promoting stability, transparency, openness, or some such malarky. All true enough, but the real service that Snowden has rendered might be in saving the world from a nightmarish potential combination of NAZI Germany and George Orwell. The United States of America attacks more coutnries before nine A. M. than any other country attacks in any given century. We already knew that. Pretty hard to hide that. And now we know that its government watches every move its sheeple make, thus effectively owning them. To understand the reality of that, most people might agree, is a good thing, and this understanding has been (is being) given us all by Mr. Snowden. Humorously, its the gift that keeps on giving. Snowden is cagey, crafty. He didn't just blurt out the horrible truth all at once. No sirree. He parcels it out to us piecemeal, one tantalizing bite at a time, and he isn't finishded yet. Not by a long shot. Too funny. Who knows? Maybe he same Snowden gives his acceptance speech in Oslo, he will reveal in the speech that the United States is planning to attack somebody, and American special forces will swoop down, whisk him off stage, kidnap him back to D.C, try him, and stick him in Git Mo. All under the proud gaze of Barrack Hussein Obama, our imperial care taker and corporate master pro tem. Far stranger tings have happened, here in the American fun house and land of the free.

Deporting Justin Beiber

PLEASE BEAR IN MIND, THAT in the United States of America, our religion is celebrity, and celebrities are our gods. We build monuments to them. We follow their every move. They headline our television, print media, and internet news providers. Americans spend more time studying celebrities and their glittery lives than they spend studying themselves, or anything else. At the top of the celebrity heap resides nineteen year old Justin Beiber, a Canadian. He has the U. S. of A., the younger female part of it, enraptured and enthralled. But Beibs appears to be following the same trajectory traced out by other young shooting stars entering early adulthood. The pattern is this; establish yourself firmly as a child star, either by precocious artistic output plus savvy marketing, or consistent face time on the Disney channel or Nickelodeon, unblemished. Behave well, because there are few other ways to behave, at eleven or twelve yeaars of closely monotoried age. Then take it one step at a time; first date, first kiss, first driver's license, boom boom boom, like clockwork, every step duly monitored and video recorded for the adoring masses. Then, run for cover, because its time for the monster, aka grownup, to emerge from the protective cocoon. Steady dating, serious romance, breakups, allegations, drinking, fighting, jail time, rehab, the whole bundle. The "Spears-Cyrus syndrome", let's call it. But this time, the American people may have had enough. After all, this one is a foreigner. A petition bearing more than one hundred thousand signatures has reached the Oval Office, demanding the deportation of the young godling, and by law, President Obama is requred to address it. Up or down, Mr. President. Another pickle for the Prez. How would you like to be in Obama's place? He will determine the fate of America's most popular person. Either the moral majority (are they still around?) or every teen aged girl in freedom's land will rise up, camp out in Roosevelt Park, and prepare for an assault on the black, wrought iron gates of the White House. By law, non citizens are welcome to stay in the U.S. as long as they please, provided they behave well. Beibsie hasn't been behaving well. Assault charges, DUIs, the whole nine yards. And it looks to be accelerating, both in terms of frequency and severity of violation. Thus, J. B. might be headed up north, by force, eh? In the event of that, there will be a migration of young folk to Canada the likes of which we have not seen since Viet Nam. If we're lucky, they'll take mainstream American culture with them. Then, our neighbors to the north would surely love us all the more, eh?

Ancient But Beautiful People Galore

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY IS TURNING SIXTY, and she looks not only like a twenty year old, but a gorgeous tweny year old to boot. Chalk it up to a combination of modern high tech facial repair technology, involving computers and lasers and so forth, excessive wealth, and a culture worshipfully devoted to eternal youth, sex, and celebritydom. Heaven only knows what she's had done; how many face lifts, facial massages, hair, mole and wrinkle removals, and so forth. You'll recall that Christie Brinkley is a true blue American celebrity, a model, multiple magazine covers and commercials to her credit, formerly married to pop music icon Billy Joel. So Christie will die at the usual age, eighty, ninety or so, knowing that she did all she could to look young and beautiful forever, right up until the end. She'll know much more than that, and will have accomplished much more than that, but she'll also have the youth and beauty as icing on the cake, which most of us don't and won't. For what its worth. As if most people would even care to go through all that to have it. Exactly what is it worth? We might venture to ask: what's the point, Christie? All that work, effort, energy, time, and money, just to look good, as good as possible, as long as possible? What do you gain by that, that you don't already have? What was the opportunity cost? What else, in other words, could you have been doing during all this, other than reading a good book, or making and sharing memories with good friends, or making love, or getting outside into the natural world, unaltered by humanity? Or maybe nano technology will eventually extend your life span to incredible lengths, thus amking all this worthwhile. But if that happesn, we're all in trouble. Do we really want to live in a world with billions and billions of ancient but beautiful people?

A Dangerous Type of American

THE GOOD NEWS IS, the republican party has a plan to narrow the gap between the rich and the poor in America. That's what the lady Senator said in response to Obama. The Republicans have their own plan, a better plan. It consists mainly, as always, of getting government out of the way, reducing government interference, and allowing the economy to prosper on its own, naturally, without any government involvement. Government involvement in the economy, things like minimum wage, corporate regulation, and unemployment insurance, is a bad thing, and only stifles growth. Get government out of the way, get rid of Obama, and America prospers. And believe it or not, that's what they believe, or seem to believe. But you have to give these right wing crazies a little bit of credit. For the longest time they refused to admit that there was any income gap at all in America. Then, confronted with it, they acknowledged it, but said it didn't matter, that it was normal, natural, and appropiate. Now, finally, at long last, right wingers are starting to admit that this huge traditional American inequality might not be such a good thing after all. They now admit, for the first time ever, that maybe it needs to be addressed, dealt with, changed, fixed. And for them, for the right wing nut cases, that's progress. As if a minimum wage law is bad for the economy. As if huge corporations should be left alone to do as they please. As if helping people who need help, through government programs, is automatically a bad thing, even if its done efficiently and efffectively. Let the corporations do whatever they want to the environment, including dumping massive amounts of poison into it, as long as they profit, financically. After all, corporate profit is everybody's profit, in our trickle down economy. Nobody can really believe all that garbage, can they? These right wing tea party jesus guns and money types are dangerous, very dangerous, Hitlerianly dangerous, and its damned fortunate that most reasonable American consrvatives, mainstream Republicans, are afraid of them. The Republican party does not like the Tea party, thank the dear lord. We need another Boston tea party; into the drink with 'em, at least for a short swim. It might clear their heads.

Taking Off Our Kid Gloves In America

LET THE WORLD BEWARE: President Barack Hussein Obama has formally, officially removed his kid gloves. He told us that. His policies have become just a shade less antithetical to conservative values, maybe, and his style of delivery has waned confrontational. But the message is clear; he will do what he can, what he thinks he has to, by executive order, using the power of the Presidency in any way, shape or form necessary to implement his programs, congress, or no Congress, and the devil take the hindmost. Immediately, Mouther of the House John "boom boom" Boehner reminds Obama that the constitutional options allowing him to bypass Congress are strictly lmited, and that therefore he'd better be damned careful about what he tries to pull, becuase he's headed for a brick wall. Obama, ever grateful for Congressional oversight, profusely thanks Boehner for the lesson in U.S. constitutional law, a field in which Obama is well educated,, and Boehner aint. Is true, of course. The President can do a fair amount, but only so much, without Congresional approval. Everybody knows that. But B. O. will by god do what he can. The dirty little secret is that Barrack Hussein Obama, far from being the crusading bleeding heart radical socialist conservatives make him out as, is actually no less a pandering corporate puppet than his detractors. When have you heard our President use the term "redistribution of wealth", and "conversion of military assets into programs for people", like Martin Luther King and President Eisenhower did? (never) So the great American schism is finally out in the open, and everybody has their kid gloves off, and boxing gloves on. Aristotle and James Madison both pointed out that real, direct democracy is not possible, becaue th epoor greatly outnumber teh rich, and would if they could gang up and redistrubute teh wealth, aka socialism. All poor people, working or otherwise, want socialism, whether they know it or not. So, a few thousand Americas will be uplited from seven twenty five an hour poverty, and Congress will try to kill Obamacare a few dozen more times, without success. Everybody with an opinion will distort the facts, as usual, and the great America fun house of deception, appearances, and wildy distorted images remains intact, as ever. Heaven help us all.

The Grumbling American Non Alpha Minions

DON'T CALL ME, I'll call you. Or, we could do this. I have a plan. You come by my place at such and such a time, and then, we'll go from there. I'll let you know more when I have a plan mapped out, one that is convenient for me. The ideas you suggested simply won't work, for me. But thanks, anyway. I'll get back to ya...... And thus it ever goes, ad nauseam, as the saying goes. Its all done so subtle-like, so gently, but it means so much, in terms of inter personal power dynammics. We the people simply cannot find a way to work together, to coordiante, to cooperate in a mutually agreed upon activity, such as having a cup of coffee. Oh no, not in the United States of Autonomy, where everyone is king of her castle, and compromise and cooperation are four letter words, and the national mantra is a haughty, leering "my way or the highway". That's because most of us want to be in control, of nearly everything, and we simply can't all be - in control. Good heavens, even saying good morning to the neighbor is like pulling teeth. The neighbor is on her cell phone, her car is warming up, and there will be no lag time between the two. none at all. Do I stand here and wait, or let this opportunity lapse, and hope for better next month? The truth is, we all think that we must interrupt the conversation face to face because the cell phone is singing a cute melody, and, after all, its an incoming call - for me. Your incoming calls can go to voicemail, thank you. Those of us non alpha types who have been bending over backwards breaking our own plans and schedules for the purpose of complyig with those of a higher power, an alpha male type, are starting, after centuries of abject social subjugation, to become a bit restless. The meek are rumbling, albiet softly. Maybe more of a purr of vague discontent. The ultimate embodiment of the culture of the almighty individual American! Being an alpha male is no sin, even if you happen to be female. The fly in the ointment being that in a culture where damnded near everyone is an alpah male, with but a low percentage of low lifes, heads butt heads, brick walls are approached. And just think of the carnage and isolation we will all face when the meek have risen among the mighty! I'll take the highway, thank you.

Moving Up in America

THE LAND OF OPPORTUNITY is a term which is often used to describe the United States of America. And so it is. One can move from low to high in America with relative dexterity. Which is good, because in America, there's a whole lot of moving to do, a lot of distance to cover, whether one is talking low to middle, middle to high, or high to celebrity. The gap between rich and poor has always been enormous during the recent history of north america, the european domination phase, which commenced in the early seventeenth century. In colonial America the Dutch aristocrats ruled and owned New York state, all of it, from their gigantic mansions along the Hudson, and everyone living in that future state, everyone else, was a squatter. In virginia, from 1650 on, the one percent owned the ninety nine percent, lock, stock, barrel, slave, and indentured servant. Bear in mind that before the American Civil War, over half the population of white free folk were "indentured servants", otherwise known as "slave laborers". They came from the ghettos of Europe in the shit filled bottoms of wooden ships, and, if they survived teh transit, spent seven years as property of some American aristocrat before being freed to fight personal poverty freely. Currently the gap between the rich and the poor is greater in the United States than just about anywhere else in the world, and this fact is being much publicized of late by Obama himself, among others. But really, its no different than its ever been. Enter the big boys from post doctoral Harvard. With great frequency they tell us the most fascinating things. They tell us now, after due research and study, it turns out that social and economic upward mobility is more difficult to manifest in the U.S. than in every other industrialized country in the world, including all of Europe. In other words, its quite possible in America to pull one's self up by one's boot straps, but harder than nearly everywhere else. The funny thing is, the Unites States is the only country in the world which incessantly boasts of its opportunity laden society. Upon further reflection, that's hardly surprising.

Seeing and Assuming Whatever We Want

YOU CAN ALREADY HEAR our conservative global warming denying friends across the fruited plain. They are ridiculing the very idea of global warming, as one hideously brutal cold wave after another sweeps across America, one after another, all winter long. But the tuth is, of course, that in the coming era of climate change,in which accumulated carbon in the earth's atmosphere causes increasing quantities of heat to be retained in the atmosphere, and in the oceans, brutal hot will be accompanied by brutal cold, alternately, in a world of extreme weather. According to current climate change projections, Europe, during global warming, will in fact enter a prolonged ice age, as artic ice melts and cools the ocean currents which traditionally carry warmth across the European continent. Any excuse to deny climate change. Just assume that cold winter weather disproves climate change, because you want it to. How brilliant. Of course, such is the nature of the human animal. To deny, and to presume. During a recent discussion on the Bible with someone with whose opinion I differed, the person had the audacity to esclaim "you haven't read the Bible!" I assured her that I had, wondering how she ever got the information that I hadn't, other than making it up. We see what we want to see, and assume what we want to assume. Have you ever had anyone tell you what you're thinking, or what you think, or claim to? Sure you have. We all have. How many times have you heard a sentence which begins "you think". What? You think? How can any sentence possibly begin with those two words, and be called logical? In reality, it can't. But that doesn't stop us.

Abolishing Rape, Perishing Culture

IF YOU HAPPEN TO BE one of the twenty or thirty million American women who have been sexually assaulted, abused, raped, there is good news. Barrack Hussein Obama has your back! Your/our troubles are therefore over! One can sense the national feminine sigh of relief. Now, for the first time since the seventeenth century, America womyn (spelling intentional, seventeenth century style) are free to walk the streets dawning gay, and or revealing apparel, as is their current wont. Floor length baggy clothing tends to deter sexual activity of any sort, but who cares? Break out the halters & mini skirts, Obama is on his way! On his way..with what? More cops and cameras? Just what the doctor, the doctor of deception, ordered. Welcome to the never ending, ever titillating fun house that is modern America. All of us, including Barrack Hussein, know damned good and well there is absolutely nothing he nore anyone else can do to eliminate this scourge, without eliminating its firm foundation in American culture, by ripping out said culture by the roots, killing it, and starting over. Our corporate overlords spoon feed us a steady stream of women are for sex messages, and its off to the races. Oh, but we easily forget: here in the fun house, the expression of good intentions is sufficient. Sufficient to alleviate any necessity for real and immediate action. In our culutre of smoke, mirrors, and fantasy, the way to reduce violence is to arm all the good people, put everything on camera, keep track of all the bad people, and hire more cops. Throw some money at a problem, maybe it'll go away. Either that, or we'll get lucky and our much admired culture of escape through art will perish from the earth, as Lincoln might put it.

Smelling A Trap, Again

THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT is up to its old tricks, so, all is well, or rather, normal.Nothing on the scale of the fabricated Mexican War of 1846, which commenced by feigned indignation, or the Spanish War, another action based on pretext. Still, not bad. Viet Nam shouldn't be ommitted. That was a neat trick! Fabricate an attack against an American naval vessel, and the invasion is on. The current American federal smoke and mirrors concerns two big names, if not big countries. Reenter Edward Snowden, and the ever effusive Dennis Rodman. You'll recall that Mr. Snowden had the temerity to reveal ourselves to us, and the good sense to flee far soon thereafter. Rodman is the one who used to make his hair look like a rainbow, and rebound everything in the gym for colleague Michael Jordan. These days he is friendly with that young and often brash dictator of North Korea, and he expresses that friendship by flitting back and forth between the two countries; his, and the dictator's. How he manages to get permission from either country is unclear. Everywhere he goes, he brings basketballs, and fun. That's where the American government comes in. Word is, must've leaked out, that the United States of Alternative Morality would be amenable to discussions with Snowden, whatever that means. What it measn is; lure the little snot into a trap, and nab him, lock him up, and utilize "enhanced interrogation methods" to extract answers to who knows what questions. were I Snowden, I'd decline, but politely. Rodman might be in even direr straits. Uncle Big Brother is starting to insinuate that his travels might be illegal, and that he might face prosecution, and even prison time. None of that is surprising; we all hate North Korea, not without cause, and Dennis the rebounders is sort of rubbing our noses in it. Our masters do not like that. That he was ever allowed to go to North Koreas at all is the mystery; it smells of a trap. Viet Nam and Mexico are probably thinking "I told you ".

Our Global Cellular Cime Wave

IN RETROSPECT, it was bound to happen. The world becomes inundated in cell phones and other assorted mobile electronic communications devices. A global crime wave erupts, thousands of these expensive toys being stolen all over the world each and every day, with the attendant muggings and murders. Oftentimes, people willing to deprive others of property are somewhat less willing, but still willing, to deprive the victims of life as well. Everyone who owns a mobile gadget is constantly glued to it. Staring at the tiny screen, making faces, tapping on a tiny keyboard. All the time, everywhere. The little suckers are downright addictive. People walking down streets looking at their cell phones run into lamp posts, drop off into reflecting pools, spraining ankles, ruining perfectly good formal business attire. And the criminals and potential criminals, who are everywhere, think, "what the heck?". That poor sucker in the five hundred dollar business suit is paying no attention to his surroundings, and will never know what hit him. Nothing could be easier. Every country on earth is aware of the problem, from Latin America to the U.S. to Europe to Russia, and is searching for strategies for coping with the problem. So far, there are none. In Moscow they want to trace all phones which vanish. Other countries have other dieas. In truth, this problem will never go away without close international cooperation, because its often an international crime. Imagine that, all the nations of the world, working together. Its difficult. But it must happen, because hundreds of millions of people, all over the world, are walking down the street staring at their precious tiny screens.

Sexual Assaults, Pointing At Us All

SURVEYS INDICATE THAT ONE IN FIVE female American college students has been sexually assaulted. That's right, one in five. Is that insane, or what? Rather hard to believe. Almost as if some people are making up stories. On the ohter hand, we can assume that many sexual assaults go unreported, particualrly those at the hands of boyfriends. Out in the general population, the percentages are evidently similar. So, it turns out that as you walk down the street, there is a good chance that each and every woman you see has been sexaully assaulted. That is beyond incredible. Now I think I begin to understand why American women don't seem very friendly. They seem apprehensive, reluctant to communicate with strange men, like me. Need I wonder why? Now, to the rescue comes President Barack Hussein Obama, proud husband and father, according to him. Our leader is forming a task force, which he will assign the duty of developing a list of suggestions concerning how to deal with this pervasive societal tragedy, emphasis on pervasive, societal, and tragedy. Never doubt the willingness of American politicians to appoint task committees to address concerns! And then to hold press conferences during which they proclaim their undying love of their onw wives and daughters, and determination to protect at all costs. As if there is a damned thing obama, or any task committee on earth can possibly do to rid America of any of its deeply embedded scourges, scourges such as violence, lust for fame, wealth, and power, lust for domination, for controlling. As if there is a damned thing Obama or anyone else can do, other than waving a magic wand in all four directions, and magically transforming the United States of America into a civilized country. IN America, results get lost in the shuffle, and the expresson of good intentions is sufficient to win favor with a sedated public. Five'll get you ten Obama's taks force will recommend more laws, more law inforcement, and more surveillance cameras, pointing at us all.