Choosing Churches

I FLIPPED A COIN, heads Presbyterian, tails Unitarian, it came up heads, and off to the Presbyterian church I went. I'm not particulare. I would've been happy either way. One batch of nonsensical dogma is about as good as another,I reckoned. My church of coice, the Unitarian, can wait until next Sunday. Its a much longer drive to the UU house of admiration, and the Presbyterians provide free transportation, pre service snacks and coffee, and a free lunch afterwards, courtesy of a ninety two year old millionaire widow lady with no family and nobody to inherit her money. (I would be happy to volunteer.) The sermon centered on the beautiful, sublime beatitudes, my favorite part of the Bible, and the thought occured to me that nobody in his or her right spirit couldn't possibly fail to adore, embrace, preserve forever, and assiduously seek...seek to abide by them. Such a failure would reveal a bad beatitude attitude. All bad puns aside, one might wonder why on Earth or in heaven this beautiful, sublime list of blessed people doesn't replace the simplistic, harshly pedantic "Ten Commandments" on wall hangings and place mats. Too many words, perhaps, or poor theological judgment. The ever transient nation of Israel (which finally gathered itself together, settled down in one location, and began attacking its neighbors) was for centuries seeking their messiah, finally got one, and promptly rejected him, save for a select few. He simply didn't measure up to expectations, which were that a chariot and terrible swift sword would descend from the heavens and rout the Roman oppressors by confronting and defeating Roman power, bringing to an end millenia of subjugation. Instead they got a pacifistic preacher-teacher whose message advised restraint and acceptance. If not the Romans, there would be other worldy oppressors, even among themselves. Be careful what you wish for. They would have liberation, in heaven. A friend of mine, a Penecostal fundamentalist who wants me to see the light before its too late, responded to my religious skepticism by warning me that I would discover the advantages of having been "saved" later, in hell. Or at least I think that's what she had in mind. In my mind, anyone who believes in "hell" is mentally ill. Haven't we enough misery in this world, without inventing more in another? I thought, but didn't say it, that this cosmic paradigm quite conveniently relieves one of ay responsibility for proving the paradigm. You'll find out that I was right all along, but onlly after you die. A win win situation. How convenient. My beloved Unitarian Fellowship doesn't claim to be a discrete religion, but rather, a composite of all religions and religiosities on Earth, or anywhere else. Everyone welcom. Diversity, equality, and inclusion. When asked what he thought about Christians, Mohandas Ghandi (he hated being called "Mahatma", which means "reverend") replied: "I don't know, I've never met one." To whatever extent I am a "Christian", I am also a Hindu, a Buddhist, a Moslem, and so forth. In point of fact I am a pantheist, the "religion" of Spinoza, Jefferson (Who was actually a "deist", which technically differs from pantheism, but is close enough), and Einstein. The terms "God", and cosmos are interchangeable. Just like my Pentecostal friend, I have built for myself a universe in whch no matter what I believe, I cannot be wrong. We fashion our various gods and our thousands of religions in our own image. As Goethe said: "When I realized that everyone invents his own religion, I decided to invent mine."