Fear, In a Handful of Dust

I DON'T GET MAD VERY OFTEN, but when I do, watch out!  Have you ever heard anybody say that? Have you by chance said it to anyone? Have you ever known anyone who did NOT say it?

Everyone says it, certainly every american, and probably everyone else in the world. I don't get mad very often, but when I do, the gods themselves tremble  and cower. I am a very powerful person. My potential for anger is enormous, because of my power.

Therefore, you should never do anything to elicit my anger, because if you do, you will have hell to pay. Fortunately, however, my self control, restraint, magnaninity and generosity are such that few have ever known my wrath, or ever will , owing to the extreme nobility of my character. Fortunate are those who cross my potentially lethal path.

People like to think this about themselves, just as they like to think themselves generous, willing to render help to anyone who needs it, any time of day or night. We prefer to think of ourselves as powerful, but fully under our own control.

We like to believe this, and undoubtedly in many if not most cases people really do believe it. There is no limit to self deception, particularly when estimating our own abilities. Everyone's children are brilliant, everyone's dog is a genius. "We are never deceived,we only deceive ourselves", said goethe.

The truth is somewhat different, as affirmed by psychologists. People become mildly annoyed so often that they dwell in a nearly perpetual state of annoyance. The slightest departure on the part of others from our expectations annoys us, but only mildly. Serious anger is far more rare, and usually hidden, because people are afraid of its consequences for their own safety and well being. 

We are very hesitant to show our anger, because we fear that so doing will have lasting repercussions which will endanger us. Anger is a response to fear, anger is fear itself, and though we dwell in perpetual fear, we are afraid to show it to others.

Oh, what fearful little creaturew we humans are! Ridden with primal fear, we react to our fear with our anger, and our pretense. "I will show you fear in a handful of dust" (T.S. Eliot)

We thrust out our chests, plant stern expreesions on our faces, swell to our maximum height, stare straight ahead, and politely nod, then go on our merry way. Never show all your cards. We shake hands to show that we have no hidden weapons. Words are avoided. Our smiles are an attempt to elicit a favorable response from those with whom we come in contact, hoping they have no concealed weapons, and will not bring us harm. Outwardly, everyone is a tower of strength.

The brain stem, the reptile brain within, is always lurking, can never be put aside. It resides too deeply within. But just fear me, and I will condescend to let you live.