Different Plans: Rear Ending Girls On Main Street

BACK IN THE WINTER OF 1973, January or February, say, I was cruising main, dragging main with a good friend named Steve. We were seniors in high school, full of piss and vinegar, as they used to say. (they used to be crude, didn't they) Dragging main, cruising main, was once an American institution among high school students, back in the '50s, '60s, and '70s, but beyond that, I don't know. In 1973, gas was nineteen cents a gallon, and all teenagers, (except me) owned cars, and the race was on. The idea was to drive up and down main street, all evening, yelling at people, drinking, chasing girls. I, for one, would've had little or no idea what to do had we ever caught up with one of them. And I have no idea whether or not hish schoolers drag main now. How could they, with gas at three dollars fifty cents per gallon? Mid sized, Midwestern American town. I was happy to be riding with Steve, because he was a hot shot football player, had a gorgeous girlfriend whom he later married, and a nice, clean, tight little new car. High social status. My social status, such at it was, was based on intellect, and personality, but not athleticism, looks, or car, regrettably. We were most probably talking, laughing, drinking, looking at each other. I don't recall, but suddenly I felt a big thud and jolt, looked up, and realized that we had rear ended another car. Steve and I looked at each other, and he said, eloquently, "well, fuck me!" Two nice looking girls got out , and so did we, and walked to meet each other. Incredibly, they immediately began to act and talk like it was their fault! The first thing they did was apologize profusely, sympathetically, which amazed me, then they offered to buy us a pizza, which caught my attention big time. Steve, however, wasn't interested. His nice new car was damaged, it was his fault, he was in a very bad mood, and, he had a serious girlfriend, on whom he had no wish to cheat. He needed to go home, wanted to go home, and wanted me to go with him - to deal with his mother. I was to be his shield against maternal anger. So, he stood there, looked at the ground, and half mumbled "nah, no thanks". "WTF!" I screamed inside my head. Excuse me? I had a different plan. I was going to stand there and say to the girls, "thanks for the apology, and yes, we will be glad to share a pizza with you, but we might like to do more than that, considering the circumstances". But it all ended well. Steve married his girlfriend, and is still happy with her forty years later. And at least I didn't get in trouble that night, even though I can still imagine sitting in a nice cozy little pizza place, sharing a big, tasty pizza with two hot girls who thought they owed us, when if fact we owed them. I never got my chance to practice sexual extortion, but hell, who am I trying to fool? I would've chickened out over pizza anyway, but at least I would have had a free meal.