Writing A New Constitution

WHAT WE REALLY NEED in America is a brand new, shiny constitution. The old one is written in vague, eighteenth century legalize, and is out of date. To save time and effort, we could model the new one after the current one. We could start by rewriting the second amendment, which technically limts gun ownership to memebers of organized military forces. Moving right along, we could add the right of privacy, clearly spelled out. Everybody wants that right, some think we already have it, others point to the complete lack of mention of it in the constitution. A section granting explicit gender and sexual orientation equality is appropriate now, if not two hundred years ago. While we're at it, we could get rid of the prohibition and repeal of prohibition amendments, over a cold beer. Who needs 'em? Another great idea would be to strike the part where it says that black people are only three fifths of a human being, no more, no less. Don't ya think maybe its time to get everyone up to full person status? Just think of the progress we could make, with a brgiht, shiny, new and improved, clear as a bell constitution! It seems like half the cases which reach the U.S. Supreme court are concerned with various interpretations of some vague phrase in the constitution, and descend into utter confusion. It also allows justices to make rulings based on their personal political beliefs. Let's eliminate that with verbal precision and absolute clarity. Tradition is wonderful; it gives us continuity and comfort, and perspective. But when tradition stands in the way of improvement, it has worn out its selcome. Pity the poor, conservative little pseudo intellectuals who study the constitution endlessly, as if it were some sacred domcument, instead of a temporary expedient. Long live a new American constitution!